My t has said my mom is narcissistic. I'm the scapegoat, and my sister is the golden child. So maybe my explanation will shed some light. My sister did not grow up to be a narcissist. But she did grow up to be a super-achiever who works long and hard, even sacrificing time for self and family, in order to achieve, make something of herself, and gain the praise of my parents. She will actually suffer in order to do this. Overtime. Sacrificing vacations. Taking out of town assignments for weeks at a time. Spending 5 hours ironing her shears - or planting flowers in 90+ degree heat the day before my parents come for a visit so things will be "just right." I honestly don't know how she does it. I could never do that. I just hope she doesn't have a breakdown like I finally did.