See, I read that I'm so very confused because that's not what DBT is saying and I wonder if there's a misinterpretation or if it's being taught poorly.

I've never been told to put on a smiley face and the only skill that *might* come close is the half-smile which isn't supposed to be a fake smile. The half-smile is a relaxed, slight upturn of the lips and is based on actual science which is that we can alter our emotional intensity through certain physical changes. It's one of the harder skills to wrap the mind around and y'know, not everyone goes for it. I've probably run across a handful of times I've used half-smile. I've used willing hands, deep breathing, and one thing in the moment to help me with intense emotional urges.

I don't know if you're familiar with Marsha Linehan at all. This intense pain people feel? She feels it. She's talked about it. She used to violently self injure because her emotional intensity was so high. The point of these distress tolerance skills is to help cope when our cognitive functioning is decreased due to high emotion. The goal is to reduce the intensity so we can deal with the issue at hand in a manner that is skillful and effective.

I'm not saying this to say "OMG DBT works for all the people!" My point primarily is to check the facts. I'm not saying that hasn't been your experience and at the same time, after hanging out on PC for a while, I've realized there are some poorly run groups out there

And I will add, DBT does jack for my depression. I'm very skillful in DBT and I still live with severe, life-interfering depression. DBT helps me cope and keeps me safe. I have a complicated relationship with it LOL.

Definitely though, if it's not working for you, find another therapy. It's not for everyone. I, for example, couldn't tolerate a therapy that was heavy in transference or getting me in touch with my inner child or something :P We all have different needs and there's not one approach for everyone.

I'm sorry it hasn't been a good experience and I do hope you find something that works for you.