This is only my second post, but I really want to chime in and say I agree with those who have had positive experiences in DBT. I think there may be some "not so effective" facilitators out there if you are feeling invalidated by your group and group leaders.

Regarding distress tolerance - first, distress tolerance isn't for "fixing" depression or even distress and it's not a long term solution. It's used when you are in high distress so that you "don't make things worse". If your facilitators are telling you differently, they are incorrect. And self-soothing is only one of the distress tolerance skills. If that one isn't working, there are a number of other ones that might be more effective. And again, it's only to get you through the crisis (when you are in the "red zone"), it won't fix the problem.

Among other things, DBT teaches that there are five options for solving any problem: 1. Solve the problem (change the situation); 2. Fell better about the problem (change or regulate your emotional response); 3. Tolerate the problem; 4. Stay unhappy; or 5. Make things worse. Once you've decided on how you want to deal with the problem, DBT offers a variety of skills to achieve your goal.

Personally, I was not taught these skills as a child and am really amazed at the impact they have had on my life. I am not a "cheerleader" type person, I hate groups and I can barely tolerate therapy, but I truly believe that the skills I have learned in DBT have saved my life...and I truly believe that if it is not working for someone, the fault may lie in the person teaching it.

I have some additional thoughts and comments on the "aversion" piece (which I experienced with a DBT therapist that I ended up leaving), but will post those later.

In peace...

starlight