Hi Celtic, you're absolutely not boring and thank you for sharing
Living on your own sounds like it's making you feel kind of vulnerable?? And it is a big change, moving from living with someone to nobody/"nothing", it can sometimes take a long while to adapt
Maybe you could put out the word that you MAY be looking for a roommate, take plenty of time to thoroughly vet anyone coming forward and in that time write down and REALLY focus on the pro's of living alone, there may be more than you're thinking/seeing.
And for now.........any chance you could be inviting more people around or even spending more time with people???
And we've talked about your professor...........
The group/people not getting back to you........you know that really doesn't need to mean that they don't care, perhaps for some they may not realise the importance for you that they do check in on you........maybe some of them aren't "in the place" you're in, but you can help them understand and with that they can be there for you..........maybe some of them are "in the place" you're in and are waiting for someone to check in on them, feeling just as "dismissed" as you are, but if you were to "just say something" perhaps that could in time make a huge difference to both of you............
And..........real kudos to you on not..........since December!!!
Keep trying to do it for you though??!! Because you deserve so much more than to feel that way!!!
And the feelings bit.........sounds like your mom and sister don't really understand, because like you and your T said you are feeling something and that something is nothing........so to feel lucky about that..........????
Of course if your T wants "words".........I don't know if it's the kind of nothingness that might equal something like "emptiness", "apathy", "disinterest", "emotional numbness".........maybe some of those may fit????
But other "not so good" feelings in there as well at times though, hey?? And it's good that you're wanting to/trying to get/let them out/express them
That can help with the nothingness.
And more of the other feelings apart from those...........you know I'm seeing/saying (from what you've posted) you've still got a lot of strength going on, you've still got real determination going on, you've still got a lot of determination going on.......I know you probably can't feel these/see them in yourself as much of the time.......but perhaps try to allow yourself to focus on those feelings as well/more if/when you can. I do know it's certainly not easy but..........

Alison