Okay, so it happened again last night.... started at 6:25, approximately the same time as it did yesterday and the day before, but it lasted for almost an HOUR AND A HALF, and was SOOO much worse... I almost passed out three times because the muscles in my abdomen contracted so hard that they restricted blood flow to my brain--when they finally relaxed it surged back and I nearly fell down. I couldn't breathe during some of the contractions, and my whole body was flailing at some points.

Had to tell my parents, obviously. They called my P-doc, who took me off the 150mg Welbutrin and prescribed .5mg of Clonazepam (aka Klonopin) to relax my muscles, but by the time Dad got home with it I'd already fallen asleep. Never been so physically exhausted in my life. Today I'm still twitching a little and VERY shaken, and I still feel just as "off" as I ever have. Haven't taken the Clonazepam because A) it's not bad enough yet and B) I DO NOT want another drug in my system, as I was ranting about last night in the midst of my "sezure" (for lack of a better word).

Today the mild anxiety/panic has returned for no apparent reason, but last night things were SO bizzarre, mentally. My logical mind and the persona I associate with my "self" were very much present, but it was almost like that part of me was enclosed behind a sheen of total mental numbness; I was totally calm and didn't really mind what was going on, just felt I had to deal as it came. My actions were totally contrary to this; I was screaming, crying, making little to no sense at times, and couldn't seem to control that at all (or... didn't want to? I'm not sure). That, I felt totally detached from. It was SO strange.

I am still so incredibly scared. If anyone has ANY info on what this could be, tell me IMMEDIATELY. I don't know how bad things will get tonight...

Thank you all,
~muse