Woohoo! I sucked it up and got a pixie cut. I'd been so nervous about getting a short haircut: I'd never had one before and I was worried what people (especially my mom) would think. I had gone to my therapy appointment earlier, in a men's polo which I was hiding under a hoodie because I didn't feel comfortable wearing it in public. But later, in my polo and baggy pants with my short hair, I felt fantastic. I feel more comfortable in my own skin now. I've had such an issue with showering, and it showed when I went to get it cut, but the hairdresser wasn't judgemental. Really, it could have been a massive trigger if he had said any number of things, considering how sensitive I am about my hair and this being the first time I get to choose the haircut I want... but he was amazing. He told me to make sure I wash every other day, one wash being enough when before I'd have minimum three and still feel it wasn't enough.... It's like I've hit two birds with one stone (I love birds, though).

It's funny, people have told me I look more feminine. But now I'm wearing what I want even if it's more masculine in style than it already was, and not feeling so bothered about people's comments. And oh, I'm lucky I have a small bust size, and a sports bra makes me look flat. Whether or not anyone notices, I feel better. It's funny because I hate bras in general, but I love my sports bra even though it's constrictive.

I just wanted to share with people that would understand. I know I'm incredibly lucky I'm not MtF because in this country, it would be hell to dress the way I want to (homosexual behaviour and indecency are crimes). There is an LGBT NGO, though. There's hope.