Wow that's a beautiful old vet. You are a pretty young woman and 35 is still young, glad to know you were strong and got away from an abusive man.

I know what you mean about wanting to get away, someplace nice where you can just focus on yourself, that is what I had wanted myself. Well, unless one has a lot of money, those places don't exist anymore.

I know, many parents/family members don't understand PTSD. Yes, I know all about the emotions/mood swings I struggle with them myself. It is good that you are stepping out, helping the guys work on cars, and donating time, being with friendly people does help, isolating tends to keep one in the past and not the now.

You have had your boundaries seriously invaded, it's going to take you time to develop skills to establish better boundaries now. You did the right thing by finally standing up for yourself, going to the police and getting a retraining order, good for you.

It doesn't matter that you live in your parent's basement, you are safe and so are your children. You taught your children and important message/lesson, LEAVE, don't take abuse from 'ANYONE". Do your best to make that basement a home, you can get creative with it, it will teach your children how to be "resourceful". Just tell them you love them, they are too young to really understand your challenges.

I can't stress enough, "patience and self care", PTSD is no cake walk, it's not your fault, so your self care is important.

(((Caring Supportive Hugs)))
OE