You're discounting your ex-girlfriends' wishes as "stupid." They're not. That's a very good reason to break up with someone. A person's social life can be ruined by being tied to a partner who is a stick in the mud. Also, girls want a guy who cares what they want to do.

You're lucky that you keep getting new chances. That means you must be a reasonably attractive guy. So you will get another chance. This pattern can continue for the rest of your life, if you let it. Sitting at home pondering is not going to help.

Next time you start a relationship, come right out and tell the girl: "I tend to avoid socializing, and I know it's a bad habit. Feel free to prod me, if that's what it takes to get me moving. I want us to do things that make you happy."

Also, ask yourself if being unsociable is the real problem. First you say it is and, then, you say you wonder what other guys have that you don't. What do you think they may have going for themselves that you don't?

Another thing: Ask yourself if you don't tend to make up flimsy excuses for your lifestyle . . . like saying that your friends don't entertain because they are married. And it's not true that there is absolutely nothing else to do, but go to bars.

It is sad to be alone, but there's always an alternative, if you don't expect things to always be on your terms.