The only thing I ever did that was in any way good was my two children. And I have been so depressed for so long I don't blame them for not wanting to see me. I think all mothers have dreams for their babies when they give birth to them and I doubt any one of them is that you hope to be able to drain the joy from your children's lives.

I know they say - I have been told more than a few times that it is wrong to kill yourself because it is unfair to the family but is it really? After the initial THING of it wouldn't it be a mercy for them. What if the best thing you can do to help your children is your removal from their lives. Like a breath of fresh air after a long winter is the way I see it.

Would they realize you did it for them or would it just be another pain you caused to add to the list.