I've had a lot of mother-figures/mentors/attachments. They can be very healing. But you have to grow from those relationships. You can't just take the caring and loving for granted. In the end, we're supposed to love ourselves the same as we want others to love us. I'm not there yet. But I do make sure I only have one, maybe 2 at most, attachments at a time. Otherwise, I won't have to work at loving myself. That's why boundaries with Ts are so important. And the hole that your mom left: it will grow smaller, but it will never close or be filled. If so, then your mom never existed. For it to become smaller, you have to build yourself and your life up. The more you grow, the smaller the hole seems.

Maybe because you are ready to grieve your mom, you are feeling the growing pains. You want more comfort right now. Whether you get that comfort or not, you do have support and you're not alone. And this is why you're in therapy, is it not? It's scary, but you're making progress and doing well. I'm proud of you!