I am back on the forums after a break. I figured I could get by on my own but I have slid backward. I am diagnosed with bipolar mixed state and take just Depakote to manage it. My dosage was upped a few weeks ago but I quit on it because it made me nauseous and more angry than I was before. My doc doesn't want me on any anti depressants because he thinks it will trigger a higher level of mania.

I struggle with my job and I think it makes matters worse. I've probably been bipolar for 15-20 years and never knew it.....always felt it was me being me. I use my mania to my advantage but it fries me out. Then I get angry, ramble on about everyone being against me, get paranoid, and plan silly escapes like moving to the hills to get my head together.

Now that I have some visibility, I think it is a blessing but I get lost on a daily basis. Stuff drags me down and I come home depressed. Then I wake up and do it all over again. I try to be mindful every day but I'm gone one hour into my day.

Does anyone have any work strategies for something that is a non stop, thankless, roller coaster ride every day?