You say professional racing based out of Charlotte, NC , so i am assuming NASCAR or something similar. Just how dangerous is his job?

His job isn't dangerous. He works for a small company that specializes in race car safety equipment. He essentially fits drivers for seatbelts, seats, and helmets. He is the production manager, and spends very little time in a race car.

Have you ever considered his reluctance to get married may be influenced by his job?
Some of his reluctance to get married has to do with how much money he thinks it costs. We have had a lot of friends with big expensive weddings and he thinks he needs to spend thousands of dollars. Thing is, I'm not that kind of person. I would be happy with a small backyard ceremony and a less than $5000 engagement ring. I don't need some giant bling hanging on my hand, and I barely wear jewelry as it is. I've told him this, and he knows I'm not materialistic in the least.

Maybe he doesn't want you to be widow?

Maybe he can't handle the stress of a wedding?

This is possible, but his mother is a florist. He would barely have to do anything. His mother has so many industry contacts, and loves to plan things.

Maybe he thinks marriage is a step towards you wanting children? (have you had that talk?)

He said he wants children, we both want a family. We've talked about "where do you want to be in 5 years" and we both said that we want to be married, have a house, and starting a family.

I think you need to focus on your life and not have everything pivot on his decisions (or lack thereof)

just some ideas of mine