I’ve never read a book on how to deal with the silent treatment, (but it is interesting information I may note for future reference). I was married to a person that did this to me on a consistent, ongoing basis. His silent treatment started when we dated, but only happened a few times and I didn’t think too much of it. The first two years we were married, same deal, just a few episodes here and there, but after that, it was silent for days, weeks and months at a time until I apologized (however I never knew what I was apologizing for). We would never talk about what had upset him, he would just give me a kiss after I apologized, be intimate with me and act like nothing was wrong until the next day (I'm not exaggerating here) and it started over again. No reason, just a game he played to feel powerful I guess. It was torcher and I don’t wish it upon my worst enemy. Unfortunately, after 4 years of the abuse (and it is abuse) my situation ended in divorce. It was killing my self-esteem and I was miserable. I deserve better.

I’m not saying that you should end your relationship, however until he understands that it is not ok for him to treat you this way, he will continue. And as long as you allow him, he will continue. My opinion is to not give him an ultimatum, but to kindly say, I wish we could talk about what ever has upset you and find a resolution so we can move forward in our relationship. I love you and care about you, however I don’t deserve to be treated the way you are treating me and I won’t tolerate any longer.

Then, don’t contact him anymore. Go about your life, hang out with friends, find activities, to keep you busy. It may be a few days, but if he truly cares about you he will contact you and talk to you about it. If he doesn’t contact you, please move on and find someone that values you and will put forth the same amount of effort in love and consideration you deserve.

Hope this helps, Good luck.