Thank you all for your interest and nice comments. I am having an awful time. I don't even feel that sad. Mostly I just feel tired and have an awful tough time getting up in the morning. I've never slept so much in my life. Where I've gone for my psych care, I'm soon to be discharged, as they think I'm too stable to need to continue there.
I got a few things done today . . . . went to my bf's place and got him fed and shopped for some groceries for him and got him showered . . . . cleaned up his apartment a bit. But I've come back to my own place, which normally, I wouldn't do. I just am getting to where I don't want to be with him for much. It was a big deal to get him showered. He claimed he showered yesterday. I believed him, then could see that the bathroom had not been the scene of a shower, since I was last showering him over a week ago. I get so demoralized that I have to struggle with him to get him to do anything that he should. And he just vegetates . . . .
So I'm glad to be back to my own place. Tomorrow I must get some things done. I must go try and join where I can get some exercise. I was in reasonably good shape a year ago. Now I'm becoming weak and deconditioned and tired.
I take Vicodin for bad muscle spasms in my neck and back. I've started to take it to feel better mentally because it does lift my mood. I'm just desperate to try and feel better.
|