Thank you for your response.

I don't worry about my mother. I tell her because, as I said, she is my best friend. I'm an only child and my mother is so cool, that I can share everything with her. But I don't trust too much her advice, cause even since my dad died she thought she was better off alone than going back to frustration and disappointment from dating. She is the all-or-nothing kind of person and she would never have had patience in situations like this.

I have had maybe too many other relationships... Nothing really serious, though. I've been proposed to twice and I have rejected those proposals. As I said, I used to just have fun with some guys I knew they liked me whenever I felt alone, even when I didn't really liked them. I had always been honest, but that's what I did until I understood that I was being such a horrible person. But I'm also too dumb when it comes to the guy I do like. I get nervous, I get insecure and I go too easily with just one hug or just one kiss.

It's like whenever a guy tells me "you're bautiful", I'm planning my wedding and naming my children. But deep down I fear that moment, I'm kind of a commitment-phobe. I don't understand myself.

I have been truly in love twice before. I was too young then, not even turned 21. Then it has always been infatuation. I have been alone for almost three years now, but I recall my ex boyfriend every single day. He hurt me so much! He's married now and his wife is pregnant. Maybe I'm rushing into things because I can't believe that he is so happy, getting what he wanted (he asked me to marry him and he wanted to have children a.s.a.p.) and I'm alone and confused.

I know I'm not in love, so I don't want to make such a fuss about this other guy not even texting me. Still, I don't think it's fair that this other guy just disappears after behaving like we were serious. I just wish I knew what he's thinking, what he wants and why he just stopped texting. And even more, I wish I knew what to do, because I don't want to confront him. If I have to ask him what this is all about, if I have to be the one who says the first hello once again, I don't want him. And I also don't want a man who is here today, gone today.

So... I guess I just need to figure out first why I am so upset. I like him really much and I know he likes me a lot too. But maybe I just want this to happen because I want some kind of a dream come true. Or because I want to have something like my ex has. I believe I might as well use this time to work on my own issues. But I insist, what he has done seems not fair to me!