Talking to a therapist would be a good start once you get insurance.
Just one other note, many guys want to fix things but something's can not be fixed. If this is mental illness or just an anger management problem you can't fix it, that's something she must want to work on. You can be supportive but you can't change it.
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Nammu
…Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. …...
Desiderata Max Ehrmann
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