Thank you. I chickened out. Maybe next week. I don't think he can talk to my MD or family about this, I'm not suicidal, just like most alcoholics aren't attempting suicide every time they take a drink. They usually drink because they like the feeling. I do this because I like the feeling. But I know it's wrong. And I'm horribly ashamed by it. It's hard to believe there really are people out there who can feel euphoric on their own, without pills. I don't want to die. I want to feel good. That is why I'm doing it. But I also know it's wrong, and as long as I'm using I won't get better no matter how much therapy I do. I'm lying by not saying anything.