Quote:
Originally Posted by puzzle_bug1987
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In my case I don't know what went wrong because he refused to see me anymore and he used about four different explanations and then my doctor told me another explanation. I have come to the point of totally placing the blame on him. I don't think it is fair any longer to blame myself for this when I have no clue what I did wrong or if I did something wrong.
Therapy is such a bizarre concept to me now. It seems so unnatural and so dangerous and so scary. I poured my heart out to someone and told this person things I will never tell anyone again and had never told anyone before. I was terrified these things would repulse him and disgust him so much he wouldn't see me anymore. I told him that. He said he would never do that. He would see me through to the end. He would never give up on me. He would never make me do anything I wasn't ready to do, but in the end it was all lies. He lied.
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We have much in common puzzlebug and that's not good. You certainly can't blame yourself when your T refused to see you and kept making up different explanations for what happened. I'm so sorry your T relationship came to a startling close. The ending to my therapy was devastating too. I'm sure my T is still dreaming up reasons to blame me. It's OK because I expect it. I'm ready to hash it out with him when the day comes. He never took responsibility for what happened but I think he knows inside that many, many, irresponsible mistakes were made. It was an egregious offense against me that he repeated week after week, month after month and year after year. How or why is a mystery to me (but I do have some ideas). He really can't suggest a logical reason so lying works for him. Maybe your T is similar? It's probably a lack of maturity -hit and run so to speak. I hope your T wises up and tries to end things properly. If it's not already too late.
