Yes! I am a mess. I'm not in any sort of episode or anything, but I've been having some paranoia and mild feelings of unreality again. Mostly I've just been angry. I am just pissed about having whatever it is that I have. And I hate how it's just getting worse as I get older! I hate having anxiety/paranoia attacks. It makes me so scared. My last one felt like a horrible nightmare. I woke up in the morning shaking.

I get so scared when I have those attacks I feel like I can't stand being this way for the rest of my life and having those feelings! I'm not suicidal or anything. I'm just a mess. I'm still having trouble getting over my psychotic break. I just don't know what the **** happened! Ugh!

YES I'm messed up!!!

You are not alone!