When I'm IP I always take a bunch of earplugs as well as soundblockers (like people wear for shooting or on a tractor except mine are even quieter). The last time I was in the nurse gave me a medicine cup to keep the plugs in. The day I was going home the OT stopped in and freaked out that I had not taken my pills on my last day and that I would need to stay before she saw what was in the cup. 
(Those sound blockers, you can get them at Walmart in the hunting section) really do help. I've been allowed to keep them when using them but return them when not using them because they do have a wire that if you were incredibly strong you could break and hurt yourself but mostly they're judged safe). I even sleep in them sometimes IP although it's not comfortable.
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Originally Posted by Wander
Thanks for the replies guys. Ear plugs are a good idea. It is my Bday tomorrow so if I won't do anything rash before or during that. It is my goal to get through these two days.
You are right Christina. Still, I am trying to handle this at home, esp with my Bday tomorrow. Depression is hell. I cannot think clearly. I guess if I still feel terrible tomorrow I will have to consider IP seriously. I just cannot hold on much longer. It scares me. My mind scares me.
Today the SI is under control but still there. My parents are aware of how I am and will take me to hospital if need be. I am staying at their place on saturday so at least I will be safe then. Tonight I am supposed to be going out with a couple of new friends from work. I don't feel up to going but really need something to do as evenings are bad. I am talking in circles. I know I need IP but I am resisting it for some reason. The depression is eating me alive and confusing my thoughts.
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Bipolar 1, PTSD, GAD, OCD.
Clozapine 250 mg, Emsam 12 mg/day patch, topamax 25 mg, ,Gabapentin 1600 mg & 100-2 PRN,. 2.5 mg clonazepam., 75 mg Seroquel and 12.5 mg PRNx2 daily
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