I'm not sure where to post this. . .here or psychotherapy arena, so I'll try both. It's a therapuetic issue, but has to do with DID.

Saw my T today. . .we have had an ongoing relationship for nearly four years. I think some of you are familiar with all of that. Anyway, he has been largely unaware (or maybe he hasn't and I'm just snowing myself) of the others, but then my dx is rather new anyway and I'm not exactly sure it IS truly DID. Don't you have to have like two extra distinct personalities? I don't know. . .it doesn't matter. Anyway. . .here's what happened. . .when I got there today I was in the midst of a panic attack. First one in a while, and I couldn't make it stop. Talk about embarassing. So, he tries to help. . .tries to get me grounded. None of it is working. So he switches tracks and asks me to "experience" the moment and what am I feeling? That sort of thing. So he asks, "How young do you feel right this moment?" That's the last thing I remember. Next thing I know, I'm sitting upright (I had been laying on his couch) and have a pad and colored pencils where I've been drawing. As I'm gathering myself, he asks, "How're you feeling?" and I tell him "Kind of spacey" and he said, "Yeah that happens sometimes." So, I'm NOT about to give away my hand by asking him what happened and proving that I wasn't really there, but he isn't giving his away either. It was really kind of awkward for me, but he seemed to take it all in stride, you know? He was relaxed, sat back in his chair, very tender and caring as he usually is. Nothing really different. He is always accepting of me, always validating, he is great for my self esteem, you know? He didn't fly off the handle like some T's do.

What do I do now? I mean, do I come out and ask him? My DX is new and apparently the parts that are already inside are learning to deal with my awareness. I don't "hear" them or anything like that. One emails with me on a regular basis, but other than that, all I know is what others have told me.

Ideas? Help please.