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Old Apr 25, 2015, 11:24 PM
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color14u color14u is offline
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Member Since: Feb 2015
Location: in a life of delusion
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Zayabean View Post
I know it's not always about me. I know this. But when someone cuts you off, it hurts. It hurts a lot. They were helping me stay strong. Someone to lean on. Someone who understood. Someone who talked sense and kept me grounded at times. Or who could just hold me and make things feel better for the moment. Who I could cry to, or laugh. Maybe it was all in my head. But it hurts. Especially when I don't know why. I see this person from time to time and they won't even look me in the eye. I know they have their reasons. I know it's not all about me. But I hate it. And it just keeps hurting. My T said I have too many other things on my plate at the moment, so this is probably best. But they were helping me. Maybe I was just too much of a burden. Too complicated. I do have a lot going on in my life, but this was good. I was feeling some sense of happiness that hasn't been in years. I felt it. I smiled. I don't want to let it go. And I'm sinking back into that horrible place that I loath to be. That place I never seem to escape.
I do understand the hurt. You feel like there is some light but it's not what you can have. I am sorry for your pain. I wish I could help. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
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Light thinks it travels faster than anything but it is wrong. no matter how fast light travels, it finds the darkness got there first, and is waiting for it - Terry Pratchett