Hi finding my way. I think when you say this
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i'm not sure why i try to explain. but i started feeling this fear inside and then found myself visualizing trying to soothe a small child and talking to her to try and calm things down.
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you are onto a significantly effective tool for dealing with yourself. I see an inner child in me that needs to be comforted and talked too. This seems like an important development. Have you considered talking to a therapist specializing in dissociation and or PTSD? Having someone sympathetic that understands and supports you.
Personally have no success explaining to relatives. They don't want to know. They want to see a normal life on the outside, but they really don't want to know what is going on in the inside.
Many people who are actively involved in Psych Central find it helps take them out of their own problems to develop empathy for others. And their problems though still there are more manageable.
Some people find the forums give them the compassion and empathy they seek.
http://forums.psychcentral.com
Please feel free to private message me or any of the Community Liaisons by left clicking on the name in blue to the left of their post) for questions or just to share.