it came to any decision making. It was all on me. If I didn't plan the birthdays, Christmas, dinners, grocery list, presents and all else in between; it never would get done. Litterally, everything had to be brought up, decided on and planned by me without even a thought or opinion from him.

What changed it?

First, sitting him down and addressing the problem with FACT. No blaming, but pure fact. I do this this this and that. Next time I'd like it if you'd do this this and that.

Finally, the extremely difficult and strong willpower to step back and NOT cover his short comings. Stop making the plans, stop cooking the dinners, stop all of it.

Trust me...that's HARD! Plus, you miss A LOT of important appointments and other responsibilities but that's what it took.

When he started to even barley become involved, I'd praise him. Tell him I thought it was sexy he was doing..blank blank blank ect..

I still do the blunt of it. However, it's a work in progress that will take a lot of time and understanding. He has been cooking dinner these last few days he's been home. Doing the dishes and picking up around the house. I'll have him schedule the next Dr. apt when it's needed.

The biggest impact to help change this behavior is you stepping down from the plate and allowing the stress to become his problem.

He may not notice it until you bring it up on occasion.

"Sweetie, you never made a grocery list. We won't go grocery shopping until you do that." STICK TO IT!

"Honey, Billys birthday is coming up. He'll be really sad if he doesn't have any gift. You need to buy him things."
---As hard as it will be for you...you can not step up.

These are just examples but I'm sure you get the idea here.