Hi! I needed to write you because I totally understand you: I've been thru the EXACT SAME THING recently (a week and a half ago I broke up with a guy who did almost the same thing to me). It is outstanding out similar our experiences are! My exhausted wandering for answers got me here.

Just like you, I dated a man for only 1 month that seemed like so many more. Started too intensely... I have to mention, he is an englishman while I'm argentinian, he's 30 I'm 25, he's a military engineer, I'm a student still. And he's depressed (as his mother was), altho I also think he could be bipolar (his sisters are, as he told me).
I want to tell you my short-long story because when I read yours, I felt like what happened to me, only that my crazyguy gave me 2 reasons: emotional incompatibility and the fact we'll be separated soon (he doesn't live in my country, and I'm goin away on studies in some months anyway).

When I met him, I was trying to recover from a previous bad experience with another guy... I was eskeptical about meeting anyone really.
I used a dating App and was just boringly watching profiles when I saw this guy in my city (which never has people I like)... and I thought why not. We talked, he seemed nice, next day we met for a wine. I wasn't impressed by his profile, it was just selfies of his beard and his kinda-sad looking face, and some dogs, and him on a military uniform... ok...

But when I met him, I was so wowed by him because he was everything I liked in a man: he looked like a well dressed viking, soft spoken but manly, a gentleman, caring, chilled, we liked the same kind of movies, series, music (we even shared our favourite love song), foreigner, interesting, smart, very well paid at a safe job, same religion beliefs (atheists), and he even had the only english car you could find in this little spanish town, haha!... I was flipping out. I'm 25 and he's 30. I'm not used to so well-setted men who share almost every interest with me. He was perfect. He'd constantly text me after we first met. He'd constantly ask to see me, so we saw eachother very often, almost every day of the week.

On our 2nd date, he cooked a wonderful meal for me, with expensive white wine to match the dinner, and his place was candle lit. I was wowed.

Days later, he took me to my very first dinner at a fancy restaurant (I couldn't believe it!)... and there he confessed to me he was depressive but that he was taking his meds so he was dealing with it. I accepted lovingly because I was too wowed by my luck of finding him to even think of not supporting him in his struggle.
For 3 weeks, we did plans nonstop. It was Easter time so we both had a lot of free time. We met with my friends, hung out with my little puppie and my little brother, hung out with his friends, he told his mother about me, I posted pics on FB of both of us and he'd be totally ok with it, he told me he was quite proud of being seen with me. His sisters 'liked' the pics, and his friends, everyone could see us there...
One night, I couldn't resist it. I was quite hooked up to him by then, I was too used to seeing him by then... at the mids of our 3rd week. We were about to sleep, hugging, and I told him, feeling totally vulnerable, "I really like you"... he waited and replied "You're one of the most beautiful things that ever happened to me" in his deep soft spoken way. I asked him to be my boyfriend, he said yes and asked the same to me. I said yes. In years, I haven't been so happy and so in peace at the same time.
There I think I just let myself go. I allowed myself to fall in love with him.

We had some fights because I'm very emotional and we were constantly going out and drinking, which didn't help. Every time we argued, he'd tell me "You're too emotional for me, I'm what people call emotionally retarded, I can't deal with those strong emotions because I don't understand them and they stress me out". But I just couldn't stop myself when drinking, so I stopped drinking. I thought with that fights would stop and we'd be ok. And we did for some days.
But he had so many vices... 5 hours (or more) daily of videogames, 1 package of cigarettes per day, constantly drinking wine and pints at the pub where he always hangs.

During our 3rd week, I started to feel tired of the same plans: videogames, drinking, smoking, that's it. I started to feel anxious about it because I thought maybe he felt the same way. So I started to get distant. I wasn't replying so much to his texts because I was afraid he'd get tired of seeing me. I wanted to give him time and space to get back at me excited as he was in the beginning... We had trouble about it too because he got stressed about it. But we talked, he adviced me to get 'professional help' and told me he wanted to be there to confort me and support me... and we moved on, together. It was ok again.

By the end of the 3rd week, there was a massive problem with a locksmith, where I helped him nonstop interpreting from spanish to english, for day and a half (mid sunday to tuesday I was there for him). He even stayed at my house that sunday (I live with my family) because he couldn't enter his flat. So next day he met my mother, briefly. He woke up and almost ran away to meet the locksmith... But staying with me at my house, meeting my family, that for me was a huge deal... Really huge.
The following monday I was so stressed out helping him I completely forgot about Uni and about everything. I was just there to help him solve this issue. I cooked for him because he seemd to have forgotten about it. From 1 pm to 9 pm, nonstop, trying to solve this issue with him.

Tuesday came and we could solve it (but he had to pay 1000 euro in one day because some locksmith tricked him and pull his whole door away)... But, as the military service pays him so stupidly well, he was ok with it.
That day he gave me a lift home and told me he'd invite me for dinner the upcoming days to thank me for all my help. I told him with an icecream I was fine, I just loved to help him.

Tuesday night I couldn't sleep. Trouble. I was watching his FB and noticed that at one pic where there wasn't any likes before (and you could see his naked ***... I mean, a very innocent pic but still) there was one from a girl from London. I took a screen cap and sent him with "just curious but who is she?" at 2 am. Ok, not cool, but women sometimes do the most stupidest things ever...
Next day at Uni, he was replying I shouldn't send stuff like that, it was weird for him to watch it, and that was an ex, and blabla... I just wanted to know who she was and leave it like that. But he started to get weird about it and so did I. He didn't reply back for a whole day. During the night, he called and said "we're emotionally incompatible, and besides I'm gonna leave soon, and you'll too, it'll be tougher by then so there's no sense in going on with this, we're thru, it's a decision I've made and you got no choice on it".
Coldly.
I went to his house, he came downstairs, told me the same, coldy. Looked into my eyes, coldly, and told me "There's no more you and me, I don't want to be your boyfriend anymore, we're too different, you're too emotional, we're done, accept it, there's nothing you can do". I told him I had feelings for him, he told me him too but that he couldn't go on like this, and knowing we would be soon separated he wouldn't enjoy the time with me... He had no more to say.
He tried to go upstairs again and I couldn't leave him so I stepped between the door so it wouldnt close (I couldnt let him go), asking him to please reconsider things, that it was a couple's fight and that's it, that we should try again, that this couldn't be happening from one day to the other, and how could he change his mind so much, etc...
He threatened me to call the police if I didnt let him shut the door. I couldn't, I was in shock and by no means I could imagine him leaving. He called the police. He walked to the station threatening me that if I didn't go home he'd put a report on me. I couldn't believe he'd harm me that way, it was so hurtful that I couldn't wake up and go, i'd just walk next to him and whisper 'Please, don't do this...'
He made an scene in the streets. Told me I was infuriating and that I was mental. I just couldn't leave, even when I wasn't really talking and I wasn't even touching him. He was my gentleman just one day ago and now he was this. It was too unreal.

He saw a patrol car and went their direction so he could report I was 'stalking' him. Then I freaked out, and went away. I called a friend in shock, and went to her place (2 hours away from my city...). Got there by 12 in the night, completely destroyed.

The following days I wouldn't eat, would barely try to smile not to look so miserable, but wouldn't stop crying. I couldn't understand how this happend. That because of a silly fight he'd push me away so coldly and with no return, after only 1 month.

It's been a week and a half. I've been really down. I've had sex with 2 other english men, trying to forget him, tryin to feel excited again... Nothing.
I fought physically with my mother during a night where I was drunk and had texted him and he said I should let this go, we weren't and would never be a couple...
That night I totally broke down. I feel so miserable for fighting with my mother. I went insane. I think I really lost it that night. A friend was there and pulled me away. I don't know how but I had some wounds in my face, which are still healing, and might leave a scar.
I saw him a couple of times, when we met so he could give me my stuff back. He was cold. And met him again at the pub he always hangs (I went there 3 days in a row -with other people- to see him, as I'm still not over it).

And it doesn't end there. My period hasn't come in a regular way. Last time I was with him I bled a little (we didn't take precautions, I thought I found the one so we stopped using it). After he broke up with me, blood came 2 days and then went away, when usually it's 5 days. I told him I'm scared, and he told me he'd buy me a pregnancy test and that he wanted to be there when I take it (I'm sure he's afraid I'm gonna trick him or something) so we could do it TODAY in his house.

I'm writing also because after all I've been in a week and a half, where I even lost my head, seeing him again, privately, I don't know how that's gonna work out... I wish he knew I never meant any harm to him, and how much I love him despite all the damage he has done to me. Deep inside I still wanna be with him and feel like in the beginning.
I don't know what to expect. He wrote an hour ago that he already bought the test (he bought TWO TEST KITS "just to make sure"). In a few hours, I'm going to his flat and take it. But I don't know how to act then. The nerves from the test and from being like this with him...
I feel used, and like he wants to really make sure with those kits so that if they are negative he has nothing at all to do with me anymore. But if they positive? I feel like he hates me now, he thinks I'm pathetic for being so attached to him.

But I am like this because he allowed me to for 4 weeks that felt like much more time...

I don't know what's gonna happen and I'm scared. My emotions are just all over the place. I can't allow him to hurt me any more. To look at me coldly, and if I open up to him and tell him how I still feel, he'll reject me again and I'll fall into that deep hole again...
I understand you so. Even when he gave me these reasons, I still can't believe how from one day to the other he left me so coldly.

Wish me luck today. I hope you're totally over your bad experience.