I left my description of what it was like for me to evacuate New Orleans in Creative Corner. It's pretty long, a little essay.

As I was falling asleep in the shelter, after 24 hours on the road in my car, I was so fatigued, I remember thinking as I fell asleep -- So this is what a lupus flare feels like. The shape and dimensions of the fatigue are heavier, more encompassing, I think than my normal level of fatigue and depression.

After I got to Austin, after another 9 hour drive, I spent most of the next 24 hours holed up in a motel, sleeping, resting. And as late as Sunday, I had a day when I pretty much did nothing.

Upon arriving back in New Orleans, I feel totally hopeless, helpless. So down I wonder how I will ever stand up again. Breathing takes too much effort. Had a med check today. Upping the Effexor and swapping out one other sleep med for something similar but will help with joint pain, but keeping everything else pretty much the same bec. he doesn't want to change too much all at once.

I think I have a cold or my allergies are acting up.

I stopped going to the class in renovation that I started with so much hope earlier in September. There's a Restoration meet and greet in about an hour, but I don't know if I can drag myself to it.

Haven't taken a shower in 2 days, and all my bags and boxes are unpacked, all over the floor.

Hopeless, helpless.