I sure wish I were asleep....I got about another hour before therapy. And that's it since I woke up yesterday. This is not so good.....Hopefully tonight will be better but it's going to be a little emotionally rough since I found out that there is some chance that my cat's skin infection/pulling all the skin off her belly will be the thing that ends her very long life. I have stopped believing that much since I've been hearing that she was dying for years now and last June was told to expect only a few more months (and instead she's done everything the opposite of a cat in kidney failure as advanced as hers was supposed to be) but I also know that she won't be here forever.

It was so hard at the vet's. Last night I had a lot of scary focus in my thoughts about violence with animals and then I took her and had to listen to her scream in pain when they took urine from her bladder to check it and then again when she got her shot and she just went into a shutdown with her head buried in my armpit and her whole body pressed into mine. She's never been afraid of the vet but now she is deaf so she can't hear what is about to happen and she also knows the routine b/c we have to go in frequently. So I have to put all that stuff out of my mind to sleep tonight and I hate when they warn me that I may have to make quality of life versus quantity decisions.

Poor old girl.