And here we stand for we can do naught else

I feel no joy in anything

I am putting off going to the doctors for the 'thing' on my kidney because, honestly, I hope it is cancer

That way I can die and not eff up a suicide (I wouldn't even do that right)

I never realized how much of me was my friend who died last year. We were friends for a long time, had very similar hobbies and a good chunk of that was bouncing our opinions off each other on them

Right now I am either destroying or selling my possessions because I don't feel anything for them. I used to read the comic Walking Dead because I would shoot the **** over it with my friend and now... it means nothing

I don't make friends easy (well, duh, everyone says) and I cannot find someone like him. Why did you die? You weren't old, you didn't deserve it

You mattered to a lot of people. Especially me.