BearPaws: THANK YOU!!!

The question was, "If you are a woman who WOULD marry a man who could not support you, why would you?" If you like you can change that to, "a man who could not pull his weight financially, regardless of his other qualities." - Ask a stupid question, I guess.

For the record I am not a bum. No drugs, no booze, no bars, no fooling around, I completed 9 years of college in several subjects, a multi-instrumentalist, have a bachelor's and master's, I'm responsible, respect women, and want more in life than sports on TV.

I didn't specify, but I have epilepsy, a benign brain tumor, and am at the moment am recovering from back surgery. This year I was in school for musical instrument repair, with the department of rehab helping. I got a 4.0 for the fall, but an old back injury became totally disabling, I had surgery, missed the second half of the course. It was a good plan for getting a good career that I could manage, but for now it's on hold. That's just to start! I know there are lots of people worse off than I am. My problem is that when I try to live like normal people I end up in the hospital.

There are a million reasons why someone would not want to marry someone else. Maybe you can't stand crooked teeth. It doesn't matter, that's ok. The same goes for someone who is not financially independent. That's ok too. It's perfectly legit and respectable to not want that. However I refuse to believe that because I'm disabled I should give up on life and love. Marrying me would NOT be for anybody. I need someone who can deal with all that.

As the current discussion seems to suggest, a lot of women wouldn't do it. I was hoping to understand what might motivate someone who thought differently.