I'm 31, been depressed and suicidal on and off since 13. My official diagnoses are: Borderline Personality Disorder (more common in women), Bipolar type 2, and Generalized Anxiety Disorder (and maybe Eating Disorder).

If you knew me in real life, you'd have no chance of guessing that I'm in this sorry state, because I go around wearing a mask that hides a miserable human being that just wants to be loved.

The root cause of my unhappiness is that I'm alone and don't know how to connect with women. So, I've been alone almost all of my life. Truth be told, all I really want in life is a special woman to share it with.

By most third-person accounts, I'm intelligent, good looking, healthy and very fit, relatively successful, and have a lot to offer as a friend and bf/husband. After suffering through college, I earned a Computer Science degree and have worked as a software engineer for the past 8 years.

I'm probably only alive today because I discovered resistance training 7 years ago, after a bad breakup. It is the only medicine that consistently works for me.

I must say ... I'm really glad I discovered the men-focused support subforum here. I'm mostly on the BPD forum which is dominated by women (who don't understand male problems).