Quote:
Originally Posted by Rose76
I don't know what your husband is angry about, and you may never know what drives his mindset. A psychoanalyst could spend years talking with him and possibly never get to the bottom of it. But he is very disturbed.
Trying to analyze him is not what is most important. Your responsibility is to figure out what you need to do to build a good life. If he is being hugely unfair to you, then you have a right to get out of this marriage, if you want to.
It sounds like your parents are decent people who love you and want you in good circumstances. They are probably the best advisors you could turn to. Your father's way of thinking sounds a lot like mine. Though your husband doesn't sound violent and threatening, there's no telling what someone who is disturbed and angry and demonstrating some real bad attitudes might do. Priority #1 is your safety. You might want to seriously consider getting out of that house.
Your husband is still telling you that you are a bad wife. I'ld have a hard time staying with a man who thought so little of me. But what I might do is beside the point. This is your call. No one can make it for you. Not me and not your parents. If, after more thought, you decide you want a divorce, tell that to your parents. Get some books on the subject. Find out what steps you need to take to protect your interests. Get legal advice.
Be careful about making any divorce announcement to your husband and staying in that house. He might get very upset, depressed and even suicidal. If he got to not valuing his own life, he might not value yours either. Retain a lawyer and be very open about your problems. It might be wise to pursue a legal separation as a preliminary step. That leaves all your options ooen, even returning to the marriage.
|
Im not trying to analyse him. I just dont understand how anyone so young can be so angry. Well, thats why we have a variety of people in this world. Yes. I am working on me right now. I have seven days left of school. Im sure everyone know because I keep reminding everyone. Yes you do sound like one of my parents. He reminds me at least once a week that I was a horrible wife (in his eyes). I cant turn back time and I cant change his mind. I know that I am a good person and was a good wife to him. I am very busy this week and weekend with sports and school. Then I can devote time to just me. I have spoke to a lawyer and my dad told me from day one to file for separation. I didnt do it. I will look into it more next week. I do have a place lined up for me to stay if need be. I am open with my problems or how this came about. If I lie then I get lies in return. The truth is very important to me at all times in my life.