Hi Gracey,

It sounds like your T knows what he's doing and knows more than you think he knows concerning his evaluation of you at any given time.

I think Sky has a point and "forcing" barriers down at this time will only cause flooding of emotions and events that you may be ill equiped to handle. Let the therapy process evolve BUT also be honest with your T. When he asks questions, it's okay to say "this may sound crazy but I feel . . . ". I think you will be surprised at his answer and it sounds like the answer from your T will be one that reassures you that you are not crazy. You're actually very adaptive for having been able to create "a system of defense". Trust your T and be honest with him. He will be able to help you better and be better to help you help yourself.

It's all okay. Gentle Hugs (if okay) Anne