I really agree. It's so much harder to get closer to people once they've already been at a distance. I think I need to get over the scariness of becoming closer to people.

I still feel upset when people feel they have the right to bully me because I act distant. I sometimes wonder, "Why are they concentrating on me so much?" but I feel a little paranoid sometimes. I think it's because some people like to bully, and see me as an easy target. I don't give the impression of someone with a high self-esteem. I see people who act distant with me a lot, and I do feel upset when I see that they are usually very friendly people with others, but I would think they can see I don't have many friends and treat everyone the same for the most part. Then again, it's really hard to put yourself in someone else's shoes. Maybe they are thinking of themselves and what they'd be feeling if they were acting like me.

I use "distant" to mean they don't have much to say and seem to be in their own little world. I use "cold" to mean they are rude and short with others, but not necessarily distant. I'm not saying those are the real meanings of the worlds, but I bring them up to put in context my own meanings.

So I realize that when women act distant with me, I shouldn't feel upset unless they are being rude. Even then I shouldn't feel upset, but recognize their feelings and move on.

Sorry, venting a bit more . Makes me feel better, though.