Hello,
to me this sounds like an unhealthy relationship.

I mean when you cant even be yourself and be honest and have to worry that she might just give up on you then what's the worth of this?!
If she'll simply dump you and move on to the next patient then you should try to find out if this is so and if it really is so then losing her as a therapist would be no big loss.

But it seems like you already depending on her. I think this is dangerous. I also notice that I can also start to depend on persons really fast and then it feels like I cant go without them anymore. This makes me question if therapy is worth taking the risk of causing additional pain.

I think you should try to find out what kind of person she is and wether she'll really dump you when you dont "function" the way she wants you to. To me it sounds absurd to dump a patient when he doesnt make enough progress. Why would she do this? Cause SHE wants to feel good about herself and feel like she fixes people and those who dont get better simply get replaced? This would be absolutely sick!

Also ask yourself why you think you need her. Is she really that good?
Think about the things she says to you. How much of this is really helpful?
How much does she say at all? Or does she only listen and ask stuff?
I noticed that when coming out of a session it is VERY hard to really tell if it was
good or not. You have to go through it later on and think it all through and then you
often find hints which show you wether it was helpful or not.