Perna,

I agree..I don't believe it is a "thing" to hold onto. What I am referring to, though, is the ABILITY to reconnect with T, in my mind; something that has been very difficult for me to date without some sort of physical contact such as a telephone conversation, or an extra session. What I have experienced, then is the inability to reconnect.

T explained it this way: When we are babies we form a bond with our mothers. As we grow into toddlers and nursery school aged children that bond and the trust within has grown to the point where we can trust that she will be there after school to pick us up. It's called object constancy. For whatever reason that process was disrupted for me. So after a few days have elapsed beyond my session, it's as though the bond between me and T doesn't exist anymore. I have no object constancy.

Thank you for your thoughts. It helped me to think this through a little further.