Yes is in the subconsious level. When I try to create the connection its to contrived. Its in my new thoughts and feelings that I feel T the most, when my old reactions are sudden absent and these new reactions, way of being is suddenly there, except its not until I'm faced with a situation that brings these new thoughts, reactions into play do I notice how much I have internalised T.

It reminds me of how a child must feel when facing a challenge in life and fall back upon their mothers to see how their mothers face these same challenges, except it happens so quick it just becomes part of who we are. I've taken qualitys from T and adjusted them into my value system and they morph together, I feel their mine but am aware of seeing them in T also.