I really feel for you. I have also been in your situation albeit many years ago. It lasted a lot of years and truly destroyed any self worth I had. I got so confused as he blamed me for everything that was wrong. I can only advise you to get him to leave and then get some help for yourself so you don't suffer over him for years. All the best. Take care and make sure you are safe. I don't like the sound of him or the way he has acted towards you. That is not love. You do not deserve this bad behaviour.