Hello All,
I am looking for a support group. I am 47, a mom to 4 kids and have been diagnosed with Bipolar I, mixed with rapid cycling since 2000 although symptoms have been present since teen years. I have had multiple hospitalizations including recent one that included 10 treatments with ECT ( aka "shock therapy.") The ECT was not successful. As a result of the ECT I have suffered horrible memory problems. I have a new pdoc who is supposed to be the best of the best. I am on Neudexta, abilify, xanax, and just started wellbutrin. I also have PTSD from childhood trauma. Since the ECT I have been more depressed and although I am not cycling ( which I am thankful for) I am having so much loss of motivation, fatigue, and sadness that I honestly have had thoughts that life is not worth living. ( I do not have a plan to hurt myself). I also lost my sister to suicide last August. I don't know where to turn. I have a weekly therapist, a pdoc, a supportive husband, and I am reading two self-help books reocmmended by my pdoc. But... I can't seem to even shower or get out of bed. I am just TIRED of fighting this. I have been on all the meds ( Lithium, Lamicatal, anti-psychotics.) I am also praying non-stop for peace. Any recommendations? I read the thread on what makes people happy and it helped a little.

I appreciate your help in advance.

Mom2trips+1