Pejorative:

You gave an excellent description of your anger. You gave us an understandable history and you gave us something to work with. We can all see ourselves getting angry at the rude jerk who insulted you and your history...besides he grabbed you by the arm. What an offensive guy!

You are trying to figure out how to deal with this kind of situation, including insults of your ethnic background:

- Forgive and forget?
- Meet and talk?
- Assault him physically or mentally?

I'd encourage you to consider another alternative: avoid being offended by this guy's prejudice, ignorance, and rudeness. Look up the Methods for Changing Your Emotions in Chapter 12, including Relaxation, Determinism (to understand him)--also in Chapter 14, Reducing Unwanted Emotions, and especially Desensitization.

I'm thinking that the best reaction you could have to offensive comments and actions might be indifference, in the sense of not getting bent out of shape by such crude comments. Just know them for what they are and to avoid considering it your duty all alone to correct them.

With this attitude, I'd be interested in a self-treatment plan you could devise that you believe might really work. I think of this reaction as really strong and far superior to over-powering this thoughtless and weak man.

Sorry I didn't respond to your post right away.

drclay