**hugs everyone** Thank you so much for your kind replies. I've been a bit limited on the number of posts I'm allowed as a newbie which doesn't let me respond as often as I'd like. You've all been great and I appriciate each of you.

Weekends are a difficult time for me as I have too much time to think. During the week, work keeps me busier. I'm ok for now though. I'm just getting through a med change and trying to focus on living outside of the dark little box that is my mind. (I'm also trying to maintain some sense of humor. Is it working?)

I still think about cutting and bruising myself to get away from my lonliness and sad feelings. I haven't SI'ed in 2 days and I feel it building. At least I am able to keep the wounding under control, nothing too big. I still don't want to quit. I'm like a smoker who's gone from two packs a day to 1 pack every two days. Better but not quite there yet.

I'm just babbeling on a bit to vent some of this. I know someone may read this and that helps. I feel compasion for you all even though I don't know you and would be happy to to lend you support when you need it. PM me if you like.

Forever in,
Lothlorien