SadMommy,

If there is one thing I have learned in my life, it's to never ignore my womanly intuition. It's never been wrong and I am sure yours is leaving aches and pains in your tummy too. From your story, even MINE is ringing loud alarm bells for you. I know that it is far easier for us outsiders to say, 'Get out and make a life of your own', and I know that you are trying your best to save your marriage, but hunny, if this is what you will be suffering through for the rest of your life and if this is what your children have to see and hear about, is it really worth it?

The biggest mistake women make is to stay in a bad marriage for the sake of either themselves or thier children. I know, I am one of the unlucky foresaken children. Don't foresake your mental health and the mental health of those around you for a man that obviously has a hate on for women for whatever reason.

I can see that you are a strong woman and you don't need to hire anyone to tell you what you already know. The only thing you really need to do is take care of you. It's time to work on yourself and stop being so terribly focused on what your husband is up to. You already know what he's been doing...why bother living in HIS past...it's time to make YOUR future.

Please consider making a life of your own. If you are scared that you will have issues making ends meet, or adjusting without having the helping hands of your husband around all the time....just think about where his hands may have been earlier in the day and what diseases he might be carrying and what you might be saving yourself from should sleeping with him might now carry a death sentence after he bedded with the pole pug!

I'm pulling for you Sadmommy. If your husband were to come within 10 feet of me....well...he'd find himself being grilled on high without a non-stick pan!