Thanks. It sounds like your experience is that a serious relationship becomes suffocating as you get focused on the guy, draw away from stuff for yourself and draw away from other people, and as you just explained even move to a place where you know no one and thus feel completely isolated. Part of the suffocation, I am thinking, is a felt inability to express irritation with him.

No wonder you don't feel like having sex under these conditions.

I am thinking, also, that a concern might be that kids will give rise to the same sorts of feelings: the fear that kids will take over your life, leave nothing for you, and generate guilt if you ever try to do something for yourself.

What do you think of the above?