I empathize completely.


I spend when I'm up, when I'm down, when I'm baseline, when I'm in the clear, and even when I'm in the red.


Always have, since my teens, I have "*****it its just money" syndrome, which leads to financial stress which exacerbates my bipolar.


It's absolutely dreadful.


It's like the only ounce of control I have is to make certain, shyt is paid for as best I can (I'm a single mom) but the rest?


God only knows where it goes.


I get paid monthly and was down to only having my travelling fair a week after pay day.


Worst part is, this month I actually thought I was being careful. I made three relatively large purchases and was certain the rest of my paycheck would be in tact for a while... Only to discover I'm dead broke and have no idea where I spent the rest or on what.


I'm too scared to check my bank statement in case I find out I was plain stupid as usual. Because I'm always thinking the bank stole from me, and I call them, only to find out I spend on auto pilot.

I swear I sleep shop!!!!!

Scary part? I got credit at a store the other day and bought a washing machine AND I still have over 3k on that card left.


I'll have to hand it over to keep myself safe.


I'm still paying off my last store debt from my lingerie shopping spree years ago that set me back nearly 3k!!!!