OK, talked to p-doc today. Was only supposed to be a 25-min med check, but it ended up being a full 50 minutes (luckily she didn't have anyone right after me)--and then I had to pay the difference, since I usually pay before the appt. I was afraid I'd find it hard to talk to her since I haven't known her too long, but I think talking about it with MC and T earlier this week really helped and made me figure out what I had to tell her.

She was concerned and very understanding (but also not "freaked out"). She thinks I'm clearly in the middle of a major depressive episode. My feelings are probably caused by a combination of factors. It could be that Effexor is contributing to them. Or it might be that it's just not being effective in treating the depression (feeling pretty anxious now, too). She's trying me on Cymbalta, which makes me a bit nervous, because I'm nervous any time I start a new drug, fearful of reactions. And now that I've had a possible depressive reaction to Effexor, which is an SNRI like Cymbalta, I'm nervous about that, too. (Doesn't help that I have emetophobia, and nausea is a potential side effect of like every psych drug practically.)

I'm seeing her again in a week, plus I'm to call if I have major side effects . Which I promised to do. Plus I see MC Monday and T Tuesday, so I have support set up if it turns out I have a negative psychological reaction.

Still nervous...