Hi Logden!

You sound as though you are still suffering a lot of pain...I'm so sorry I can't just make it disappear for you & your husband.

Grief counselling would be, I believe the most effective counselling for you & your husband at this time. Individually though..and perhaps down the road as couples therapy.

You know, I lost my 30 year old big brother...suddenly. I was 6 mths. pregnant with my first child @ the time. Because I didn't have time to grief-went straight to being a Mom....I always felt I never said enough..did enough. I authorized the Life Support..and donated all his body parts (not to science). I grappled with the Life Support issues for years. Couldn't bring myself to go through the process emotionally again. It was so painful.

In October I had a severe depression (diagnosed as BP@ at the time)and was in Psychotherapy for 8 mths. The issue of my brothers death surfaced..and with the help/support of both my Therapist & PDoc.. I finally said goodbye to him & laid any guilt/questions to rest. I felt a huge burden had been lifted.

And now I have his wonderful picture right here on my bulletin board..and I look at him..and I feel love & peace. I will always miss him..but he is truly with me in spirit.

Perhaps my story wil help you see there is a way to move forward...heal & let go through Psychotherapy.

My heart goes out to you....please consider it!

Sincerely,
Grace03