They don't always heal. After my horrible therapy experience where we did not much else besides dwell on the past I have forced myself to focus on the here and now. I think that is key for me. Just accepting the past was horrible and even some parts of now are horrible has been helpful. It doesn't mean I can't have a good life if I choose to.

I'm not sure about transference. I don't really get into all that. It seems too weird for me.