I wonder if transference is a natural thing for everyone based on previous experiences, but maybe the significant thing is the "suffering". So if people had healthy experiences growing up then that is their measure in life, ie basically people are mind and trustworthy and the individuals themselves have no problem defining and exerting their boundaries. But when previous experiences have been traumatic / abusive, then the benchmark to measure people is somewhere different and also boundaries may have been violated in the past making individuals feel more vulnetable.

Like PTSD, is that partly about applying ( traneferring) past learning / experience onto new situations that appear similar in some way?