My first real rupture with my T did not happen until more than 3 years into the relationship. He had made a couple of somewhat hurtful comments along the way, but they were just unthinking things, and he quickly apologized as soon as I told him I was upset or hurt. Our first real challenge in the relationship was dealing with the backlash of his anxiety after telling me he loved me. He just freaked the **** out, and we went through this period of him trying to distance himself and him telling me I was 'just a client.' It sucked. Eventually, it was me who fixed the relationship by assuring him that it was okay to love me, AND have to keep me in the 'just a client' position because the boundaries in the relationship are set in stone, and I was good with that, and he could relax and stop worrying.

Another later upset was unresolved for a while because he could not admit he made an error. That one would have resulted in my leaving therapy with this T if he had not finally seen my point and told me he made a huge error, he was very sorry and it would never happen again.