I give up!

I have "treatment resistant depression" which in a nut shell means.....nothing works (or insurance comp. won't pay for it).

30 different medications in the last ....4-6 years...tricyclics, SSRIs, SSNRI, MAOI, anti psychotics, anti convulsants.....

6 months of ECT treatments, 2-3 times a week.

Lost all memory of the past 23 years. What I'm able to recall is more like feelings rather than events.

VNS - ins. comp won't pay and device mfg says I'm not candidate because I'm suicidal.

Are there other options...probably...do I care?

I'm tired, discouraged and....
I just don't even want to try any more.