I know I don't feel back to normal. I don't know if we can ever feel like we can ever get back to normal after a break. The only thing we can really do is get stable enough to not have another one and they consider that normal for us people who have psychotic brains. Maybe that's harsh way to describe it, but I've been up and down more this past month more then ever than before and it's due to my bipolar sure I'm stable, but I don't believe I'm doing as well as I could be. There's something about psychosis that is alluring and disturbing at the same time. There's a point in it were you gain this freedom and a with the meds and everything afterward it's like it all goes away. I just want to be healthy and feel like that's the most difficult thing to be with this disorder.